my brain just threw up a little…

It’s not a contradiction to want all those things and not want a superior to masturbate in front of you. That seems pretty simple.

***Why not?***
*** different topic, but yeah, ponder that***

But I wonder if it’s a little too simple.

***which part is “too simple,” the watered down “procreation” answer, or your sudden leap into masturbating bosses? Did you write this piece so you could answer other people like this person who wrote to you asking an obvious question, or did you just found a pretense to wax angry on some rich bastard trying to get his jollies off by trading roles in his films for some sleazy action?***

I don’t think we can have an honest conversation about sexual harassment and sexual assault right now without talking about all the ways we have taken women’s bodies and turned them into vessels.

***Who is this “we” and how did you just jump from “sexy looks” to Harvey Wassaname to “sexual assault” and face-first into predication of “we turned women’s bodies into vessels?” ***

We use them to carry our political arguments about reproductive rights, paid family leave and affordable health care. (Who can forget U.S. Rep. John Shimkus arguing men shouldn’t be responsible for prenatal carewhen their bodies don’t go around making babies? Nevermind everyone’s vested interest in the health of those babies.)

*** Men do not carry babies. What’s your point?Are we on affordable healthcare now? From Harvey the slimeball? And what do you mean USE THEM? Who are the WE? We The People? Because as far as I see, the only person doing anything to anyone’s body is their doctor. What’s this “vessel” business?***

We use them on billboards. We use them to sell gym memberships, plastic surgery, cars, magazines, liquor, bikini waxes, multivitamins, underwear, shampoo, perfume, bottled water and all-inclusive resorts.We use them in porn and at strip clubs to get the blood flowing to all the right places, no emotion required.

***So the LOOKS are being used because there is an innate and undeniable attraction between genders. Or sexes. Or whatever we suppose to call that shit now. Apache Attack Helicopter?
So yeah, I see she is onto something here. Sex Sells. Aye, it sold for a pretty long time. It sold as long as there was a human on this planet, and it even sells with other mammals. Hells bells, even with insects. It is the nature of it. It IS a procreation trap. Would it help if this was spelled out in Chinese?***

We detach women’s bodies from women’s humanity so frequently and so seamlessly that we have to work backward to realign them. Wait, she’s a human first, remember?

*** no, we detach nothing. We do not know anything aside from visual cues. We do not see them hugging their Diploma and we know nothing about their view on Space Travel. We are tied to a SkinSuit. We have to use our eyes. Because using your voice gets you fucking maced and branded as a stalker often enough. Because trying to simply ask based on visual attraction is rapey. See? No, I guess you do not see, because you are not really looking for answers. You were already told what all those answers were. Oh well. My friend told me to read this because there were some valid points. So here I am, reading.***

We don’t remember. We, as a culture, think women’s bodies are ours for the taking.

***Stop right there. You are insinuating that appreciating the look is akin to rape. (unless you are talking about stealing corpses).***

“Why do women try to make themselves more attractive?”

I wonder why we understand ownership so much better when we’re talking about a person’s prized possessions than when we’re talking about a woman’s body.*** There is a grand flaw in your thinking. ^^ just there. I know you are intentionally doing this, but I have to point this out as a “hey look, I found a flaw!” We understand ownership because we can own an inanimate object. Woman is a human and unless mummified, is not an object. Did you just flaw your thinking into actually objectifying women?***

I’ve never once heard a man explain away a burglary by questioning why a homeowner bothered taking such good care of his house if not to entice others to break in.

Lawn mowed just so. Solid oak front door. Three-car garage. Why do you make your house so attractive if you don’t want someone to break in and start taking stuff?

*** No, your logic is akin to “did you make this airplane streamlined and aerodynamic so it could… plunge into the ground like a fucking DART***

I’ve never once heard a man explain away a carjacking by questioning why a driver bothered driving such a nice car.

*** I have. And what does this have to do with makeup and fashion?***

Why are you driving a Lexus if you don’t want someone to take it from you? You even keep it all shiny and new-looking. You don’t think that sends some kind of message?

***yeah, it reads “I am a rich fucking bastard. Welcome to my sperm.”***

Apples and oranges, you might be thinking. No one ever wants their house broken into. No one ever wants their car stolen. Sex is different.

***Did you just equate sex and burglary?***

But it’s really not. When I trust you, I will invite you into my house. I might even give you something to take home. When I’m ready, I will let you drive my Lexus. (I drive a 2008 Honda, actually.) They’re mine (again, hypothetically speaking — my house isn’t that fancy either), but I’m happy to share them with the right person.

***So you are much like the rest of us average joe’s and jane’s and your vagina is a house. You need to work on better analogies, Mrs House. You have just jumped into analogy that was nothing short of “appreciating women’s look is like casing a house!” As in “your looking at me is only welcome when I allow it!” Oh do wake up, Heidi. You cannot even draw a reasonable analogy, and your final goal is what? Oh, probably to finish writing this piece and to get paid. sigh…***

National Public Radio’s news chief, Michael Oreskes, resigned Wednesday following accusations that as an editor at the New York Times, he suddenly kissed two women while they were discussing job prospects with him.

Imagine he had leaned over and ripped their iPhones out of their hands and pocketed them. He’d be a thief — no gray area.

We’re not quite there with harassment and assault. We’re still stuck in the gray area. We’re not quite ready to consider a woman’s body her possession and her possession alone.

*** “Woman’s body”… “we are not quite there”… are you feeling ok? There are laws protecting ALL HUMANS from assault to their person and/or property (at least the ones under such laws in 1st world countries). What “gray area?” Are you trying to get the rest of the world to agree with your cognitive dissonance of “vagina-is-a-house-lexus?”***

Powerful, predatory men are dropping like flies. That’s a start. For far too long, the behavior that brought down Weinstein and Oreskes (and Roger Ailes and Bill O’Reilly) was par for a seriously messed up course. Forcing yourself on a co-worker wasn’t a career-derailer.

That’s changing, thankfully. What may be harder to change is the sense that women are somehow to blame for their own violation.

*** Are you saying that women are aware of the effect their appearance has on men? If that appearance/effect is your intended topic. Or you could maybe do something else with my time, because you try oh so hard to burst through an already open gate. Your need for making big noise is apparent and just oh-so-dramatic and lame. ***

I actually think we’ll get there. As irritated as I was at Steve’s question, I was grateful to him for asking it.

I’m not a silver-lining kind of gal, especially when it comes to hundreds upon hundreds of women suffering through harassment and assault.

But something positive can come from this seemingly endless storm of accusations. We can, with some good faith effort, figure out how to give women unconditional, unassailable agency over their bodies and, therefore, their humanity. We can examine the biases that have kept that from happening thus far, and we can ask, honestly, why we’re so reluctant to dislodge them.

***or maybe you could use laws that are currently in place, instead of taking the deal with the devil in exchange for some tang? Like all the now famous actresses who were given roles by that Harvey guy. Do you really think they are “victims?” Does it not look maybe a tad wee bit odd that they took the roles? It’s a role in a film, not The Last Parachute, ffs. I guess everything has it’s price.***

And that, I think, is the core question we should be asking.

./end

oh, and I found a picture of whoever edited this: