my brain just threw up a little…

May 22, 2009

Nostradamus and I are pals… so is Henry the 8th… and John Hancock… and Ben Franklin…

Filed under: Uncategorized — Sol @ 6:25 pm

Gout.

sucks.

May 13, 2009

on noodles, bicycles, and splashing

Filed under: lawls — Sol @ 1:41 pm

(01:32:42 PM) me: never in my entire life have I seen this word butchered like this: “…share their thoughts and ideas about bicyckle and pedestrian improvements…”
(01:32:52 PM) B: wow.
(01:33:24 PM) me: what was she trying to spell? “Bi-kick”
(01:33:42 PM) B: bicycle. I’m betting.
(01:33:57 PM) me: becackled?
(01:34:07 PM) me: bukake?
(01:34:11 PM) B: BUKAKE
(01:34:19 PM) me: BUKAKE!!!
(01:34:33 PM) B: BUKAKE!!!
(01:35:21 PM) me: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bukake
(01:35:42 PM) me: The word bukkake is often used in Japanese to describe pouring out water with sufficient momentum to cause splashing or spilling. Indeed, bukkake is used in Japan to describe a type of dish where the toppings are poured on top of noodles, as in bukkake-udon and bukkake-soba.
(01:36:01 PM) B: hahahahahahahaha
(01:36:10 PM) me: a bowl of noodles will never look the same
(01:36:12 PM) me: ever

May 7, 2009

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Filed under: commentary — Sol @ 4:48 am

majestic

May 6, 2009

Generalizations.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Sol @ 5:14 am

Once upon a time I took a psych class. I failed that fucking class. Missed grade by some 5 poins. Out of 500.. or something.

But its not what I am trying to tell you about.

I really pissed off our prof. A heavier set woman. A grandmother, a shrink… has an established practice. Smart. And not at all mean! I think she is not at all mean. For all I know she might be spanking geriatrics with chainsaws. But it was not an impression that I got.

One day she was speaking to us about something I did not agree with. And me being, well, ME opened my mouth in class. And I did that whole “ahem, I would like to erm… whassawerd… oh! Not Agree with you on that little theory there. You are describing feelings and emotions that even mature people have a hard time distinguishing, and you are saying that these rather complex emotional responses is what we observe from not even toddlers, but infants!”

And she said “Well this is my opinion that infants are capable of such complex emotions”

and I said “Well, not to make it an insult, but you are a woman, you are more prone to nurturing rather than men, and that’s why you feel confident assigning those complex emotions to an infant. It serves your comfort to know that the person your are raising is not braindea…”

And she huffed and she puffed even though I plainly stated that what I am saying is NOT an insult, she was insulted and the female half of the class looked at me as though I am dressed in a nazi uniform, with a fake hitler-moustache, burning books and pissing on people!

Oh damn… it was not a Sociology class. It was a Psychology class.

One big difference – cannot GENERALIZE.

Heed the warning… learn your statistics about people and keep your fucking Sociology in your head and to yourself! When dealing with individuals – use your Psychology.

Looking back I think it is a good thing I said nothing about her weight. She would make me stand in the corner or some such…

May 5, 2009

FSM, midgit, mountain, trees…

Filed under: Uncategorized — Sol @ 8:02 pm

Can we please all agree that midgit really should have a proper hat, boots and a mallet or a mace in hand?

Ref to this marvel please down below here yes thanks!

The Flying Spaghetti Monster

To deprive this depiction of its historic value is immoral and should be made illegal!

I would make an awesome midgit…

My inner retard is made of steel!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Sol @ 5:43 am

So, um… “Terminators”

Just like “Terminator” only with a a lot less acting and a bunch more  terminators. This flick is extremely B.

Acting so unbelievably horrible, mechanical and lame… I could not help but wonder if they heard my prayers for better prOn and made a sci-fi… no… 1970s porn… no…2-stepping ponr in space with robots in ProBass caps and glow in the dark cowboy boots? I never asked for THAT.

gods this is fucking horrible.

Please do not watch this piece of shit. Seriously, just  don’t.

Remember that thing that made it big (AHEM), Blair Witch Floater, was it? Everyone acts horrible, and all characters are dumb?  And I do not mean “dumb haha!” I mean DUMB as in fucking demented.

Did I mention that their model of terminator is scary? Especially when he makes that “KOJO-KILL!!!” face.

… and the freshly pregnant girl with a fat ass is mopping up blood off of a psychotic friend whore who was banging fat-asses husband. husband who god terminated. or something.

That is it. I give up. This is a train-wreck of such magnitude that I actually feel compelled to look away.

Mykel, I should get you a copy of this so you could understand that no armored sharks and no surfing bears are a match for this tsunami of talentless and underfunded vomit.

have a day.

May 4, 2009

stressesezeses?

Filed under: random crazies — Sol @ 7:51 pm

I want a pint of beer, a smoke, and a large box of that “peace of mind” crap I’ve been hearing about.

wikipedia.org refers to this “peace of mind” thing as a: “The absence of mental stress or anxiety, and the presence of serenity, calm, quiet, comfort of mind; inner peace.”

I’ll take that. Along with a pint, and a smoke and a ton of money so I would not have to worry about things.

I want to be able to wake up in the morning and not think about how I am going to pay for things.

There is always something. Some say that the more we have the more we worry. Maybe true, not sure. Maybe I have too much?  Who the hell needs a house, or a car, or a job, right? Dog-food is not REALLY important, no? Perhaps I should settle on a cave, pet beaver, loin cloth, and a pointy stick.

OMFG – I should be a pygmy!

fuck stress. in the eye. with a pointy stick. twice, to be sure.

commercial ads

Filed under: random crazies — Sol @ 6:15 pm

Is there a commercial for adult diapers?

Well, here is an idea for one:

Elderly lady on a scooter doing about 60mph on a residential street. Wind in her hair. Bug splatter on her dentured grin. Fluffy skirt barely held in place with an over sized purse. A small animal falls out of the tree and in front of the scooter. Sheer terror flashes across that ladies face. Sound of screeching brakes and … a sound bowels… being evacuated rapidly.  Small animal changes its facial expression from terror to that of one-eyebrow curiosity. Lady gives the small animal a short conspiratory smile and runs it over doing a 0-60 popping a wheelie. Dust begins to settle over a flattened small animal. Caption reads “It is ok to have a not-so-fresh feeling, as long as you are the only one that knows about it!”

Powered by WordPress