my brain just threw up a little…

July 17, 2012

Tim Minchin – Confessions

Filed under: Daily Crazies,immortalized (™),lawls,random crazies — Sol @ 9:13 am

July 16, 2012

took a bike ride to detroit this past saturday

Filed under: Daily Crazies,random crazies — Sol @ 8:55 am

I learned a few very important things.

 

1) my thumb and index finger tend to go numb after about 20mins

2) steering bar MUST go back to stock to remedy my issue with the buffeting

3) I MUST carry a cigarette lighter with me at all times.

4) sunblock is your friend if you ride in 96deg weather in 2mph traffic for two hours

5) random strangers on bikes can be nice to you for no reason whatsoever

6) standstill traffic sucks purple gangrenous drooping noxious decomposing donkey balls

 

July 13, 2012

another reason for better education

Filed under: commentary,Did You Know,lawls,random crazies — Sol @ 2:20 pm

I… what… did I just hear that?

Filed under: commentary,immortalized (™),lawls,QOTD,random crazies — Sol @ 9:27 am

“…candied asshole fondu over a pickle in your eye…”

July 12, 2012

somethingsomething vampire fucking

Filed under: commentary,random crazies — Sol @ 1:57 pm

It is my observation that every vampire book that I came across could very well be re-titled into “[insert main character’s name HERE] vampire fucking.”

Can we have a vampire writ that does not have “unsatisfied housewives” and “brooding dark little girls?”

July 11, 2012

from an earlier conversation with a friend

Filed under: Daily Crazies,immortalized (™),lawls,random crazies — Sol @ 5:08 pm

I just won’t be able to stay erect while chanting “beautiful-long-brown-hair-beautiful-long-brown-hair-beautiful-long-brown-hair-beautiful-long-brown-hair…” besides, I am an old evil pervert. She would not know how to reach my prostate with her toes.

 

 

from an earlier conversation with my favorite KGB operative (sans golden watch)

Filed under: Daily Crazies,immortalized (™),lawls,pranks,QOTD — Sol @ 2:12 pm

Me: oh!

almost forgot

S, I am sorry.

 

S: for?

 

Me: you will see =D

 

S: uh oh

 

Me: It’s ok, Comrade F. Motherland will remember you as a Hero.

 

S: lol oh shit

 

Me: wtf is this “oh-shit” business?! You are suppose to say “Serving Soviet Union!”

you were out in the field for too long

You must’ve forgotten the familiar comfort of standing in line at a store, waiting your turn to get your allotment of recycled bathroom tissues.

… waist deep in snow

… fending off bears and capitalist spies.

 

S: the lines were always a good way to relax and talk with neighbors. a greater sense of community

 

Me: Yes, soon you will be back in the fold, celebrated as exemplary resident of Gulag Camp #[REDACTED]

 

S: lol

 

Me: … making way for our brighter future

 

new term

Filed under: Daily Crazies,immortalized (™),lawls,QOTD — Sol @ 1:46 pm

Adj. ‘ dramalamatic’

dear google… wtf?

Filed under: commentary,immortalized (™),random crazies,screen-shots — Sol @ 10:12 am

Dear google,

Please do not assume that I want something. If I want something, I will ask for it.

Also… someone dead should not be allowed to “trend” on G+.

I insist that in the future legend that reads “Trending” is replaced with “dead pedo-moonwalking.”

 

from “did you know?”

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