my brain just threw up a little…

August 17, 2013

“Slur!”

Filed under: commentary — Sol @ 1:14 pm

Some days my brain reads much deeper into things than it usually does. At moments like these I find it best to keep my big mouth shut. The reason why it is the best for everyone, especially me is this. From everyone elses perspective a “subject-matter-occurrence-event-whatever” is just what it is. What you see is what you get. At the same time, my perception goes digging deeper into this “subject-matter-occurrence-event-whatever” and I assign different values, often time more dramatic values, to the matter observed. I draw conclusions, assumptions, predictions, conjectures, and I even make predictions and base decisions on what it is that I perceive. It is at times like these that I shut my mouth and do not freely share my mind with others, because that different perspective on the same “subject-matter-occurrence-event-whatever” can and often does create disagreements. This difference can seed mistrust, dislike, and even hatred.
With this said, here is a situation (or a “subject-matter-occurrence-event-whatever”) that I have recently observed. I am throwing this out to my few readers because I am basing a pretty weighty decision on what I perceive. So if you, dear Reader, have something to add, or if you disagree, please speak your mind before I make up mine, for I would really like to be wrong about this.

Environment: Social media. Large group of friends. All involved have a large enough pool of readers to get reactions to their statements.

Context: A group of friends who are looking to gather for some gaming, some usual light-hearted conversation, and a few drinks. Nothing out of the ordinary. One of the expected guests makes a comment in jest. Host of the gathering that’s being planned replies with the following: “Jew!”

Now, I am going to pause this for a moment to say that on previous two occasions of this same person using that same exclamation as an endearing frenemy-like stylized greeting with friends, I did not personally confront this person (being a guest in their house, you see), I opted out expressing my displeasure to their mate. I was reassured that this foolishness will stop, and that this person just “doesn’t know any better…” and that “this is how they were raised” along with “that don’t mean no thing.”
To me this does mean something. It means lack of respect. It means lack of understanding and consideration.
Let me put it in perspective for you, a form you could easier relate to: you have an african-american friend on your FB list. And you use “Negro!” as a charming greeting with a white friend in front of this one black guy.

Perhaps from your perspective I am reading too much into this. Wouldn’t it be nice if I lived my life from your perspective? Not the case, you see? I live my life from my perspective. And the way I see it, you are an inconsiderate and uncultured bigot. You may be thinking right now that I am over-reacting. That’s your perspective, see? From MY perspective, you are getting away with your face attached only because you have just used the very last of the credit granted to you by a mere fact that I consider your mate a damn decent person and a friend.

So,
I am going to exclude myself from your circle of friends. I do not feel welcome there anymore, being a “Jew!” and all. As for your friends who chose to quietly ignore your little slur – really guys? You fellows did not notice that little “Jew!” comment? Wait, are you sharing that opinion? Are you in the same boat? Come on, show me the strength of YOUR convictions and speak your mind. No harm from that, I’ll just avoid you in the future as well. I will not have to deal with “Jew!” comments, and you will have one less “Jew!” around you. It is a win-win, you see?
Show some bravery and out with it! I will not touch you, I swear it! I am a grown-up and I am not a violent person.

I am not going to finish this on a “lighthearted note.” I have no forgiveness to give out for this kind of crap. I have dealt with this exact kind of crap for the first eighteen years of my life in a country far-far away. I moved here so I would not have to deal with this ugliness. So I will avoid it the best I can.

With much respect for your beliefs,
A Jew!

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