my brain just threw up a little…

November 15, 2009


Filed under: Uncategorized — Sol @ 3:46 am

chunky is better than progresso. imo. I wonder if selling pre-packaged dinner kits would be a good idea. Just have a person at a supermarket who would assist a shopper by handing them a box tagged STEW. Magical box will contain all needed ingredients, packaged into disposable dishes, tagged with cooking times etcetcetc. Shopper comes home, reads cover of the box, no prep required, everything is washed, chopped and ready to get dumped into pot (minus the water). Everything sold fresh. In fact, make guys prep all that for you at the counter, and have them give you instructions on how to cook it all up at home. Book of recipes at the front, page gets copied right there for free, calculator on a chain (yes, you thieving twats! on a fucking chain! and so is the pen! and so is the little blondie at the register, and the register too!), figure out for yourself what will it take to make that into a dinner for four or for six, go up to the counter and hand over the list. Fat guy with red face and bad breath will look it over, and burp out “Beef tips in lamb jizz with oysters and cat shit on a rye all for four”… and then “you really should not eat that while you are pregnant, Sir” and after 20 minutes he presents you with a sealed box with instructions and a reasonable pricetag.  As you leave the store you feel better about dinner tonight. It will be made with fresh ingredients. You can hear a satisfied Baaa.

Do you know how to make bread? From scratch.

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