my brain just threw up a little…

April 12, 2018

Motorcycle Trebuchet

Filed under: Daily Crazies,immortalized (™),lawls,QOTD,random crazies — Sol @ 11:55 am

At some point of time in not too recent past I had this peculiar conversation with my colleague M.
It is quite involved and twisted, but in short it can be summed up to this – someone should invent a “motorcycle trebuchet.”
Initial idea was that a trebuchet can be used to load a motorcycle onto a bed of a truck. Fevered imaginations ran with the idea.
Before long this became a running joke and a go-to tangent for interrupting conversations.
Earlier today I saw an image of a post-crash motorcycle on “Trebuchet Magazine” site. Not bothering to post that. But I did send it to M. Below are the bits of the resulting conversation.

 

CM: OMG! DID SOMEONE MAKE ONE?!?!?!?!!

Me: I dread to think

CM: DREAD NOTHING! THAT WOULD BE AMAZING!

Me: (not for the poor bugger who was on this bike)

CM: Though I’m also curious now about Trebuchet magazine. Is there enough of a fan base for old-timey siege weapons to sustain a magazine dedicated to them in the modern era?

Me: eh… probably not

CM: And also, when using a motorcycle trebuchet, the rider shouldn’t be on the motorcycle.
That’s just craziness

Me: I know this is a guess-work on my part, but from my observations of individuals interested in trebuchets I can tell you that most of those characters are interested in actually building and firing a treb, instead of just drooling over pics of a treb.

CM: Yeah, that seems like the fun part.

Me: another sure sign that they do not have a huge (or even substantial) following is this; There are no flaming skull stickers for trebuchets.

CM: And after exploring that site a bit more, it seems a lot more focused on the modern art aspects of everything than the loading up a heavy shot and flinging it into stuff aspects of trebuchets.

Me: I say this in confidence because every other building hobby ALWAYS has a “flaming skull/flames niche”
skateboards, bikes, cars, PC cases, furniture, toolboxes, … hellsbells, even CANES.
but have you ever seen a treb with flame-werk appliques?

CM: I have not. And it seems like a thing they should have.
How else are you supposed to appropriately convey the sense of danger they pose!

Me: And it would be a great tribute to all the ancient trebuchets that actually were on fire
this would make for a great business opportunity
imagine
“Greek Fire Co.”
“How else can you make your trebuchet go faster?”
and
“Up to 30% more flames”

CM: I like this idea.
This should be a thing.

Me: And because this would make for a very healthy (albeit slightly illegal) business practice, one should immediately open a second business amply dubbed “Swing Le’Flambe`”
Offering same stickers and decals as a package-deal at a slightly higher price.

CM: I don’t see why it would be illegal 🙂 They’re antique replicas. Obviously not meant for use against government building.

Me: I believe there is some biz regulation prohibiting owning two businesses with sole purpose of justifying raised prices

CM: That’s fair.
But then again, Trump is president and they’re not actually going to go after business owners for screwing their customers (as long as the appropriate bribes taxes and fees are paid

Me: omg, brilliant
CM, I think we just struck gold
imagine this
small treb (about 8ft)
This treb looks pretty regular except it has a sling made out of orange fur. Sling is permanently attached to the channel (bottom part). When you attempt to fire it, it screams “FAKE!”
Market this device as “Trumpolette”
Comes optional decals shaped like flames with commonly used buzzwords Great, Huge, BelieveMe, etc
I think it will sell

CM: YES!
I like all of the things you just said.
Though you mis-spelled Yuge

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