my brain just threw up a little…

January 26, 2010

world’s greatest dad

Filed under: commentary — Sol @ 7:26 am

I cannot explain to you why I would just wake up after two hours of sleep and watch this movie. I do not know, really. I just did it. My brain is yet to decide if this was a good, a bad, or an indifferent experience. It just was. Quick synapse? * ahem-ahem* Long story short. Father (Lance Clayton, writer and teacher, played by Robin Williams) and son (Kyle Clayton, a 15 year old douche-nozzle with main life-interest in auto-erotic asphyxiation and scat) live together. No clue what happened with the mother character. Lance is sort of dating his co-worker Clair (sp?). Clair is stringing Lance along hoping that he will get published sometime. Lance, Clair, and Kyle have a dinner together. During dinner Kyle snaps some under-skirt shot of Clair, and later the same night uses it for a stroke material. Alas, it was the final stroke. Lance comes home to find Kyle dead and makes it look like a suicide. Lance writes a suicide note as well. Just so happens that the only person who figures out that note is fake is Andrew (the only friend of Kyle’s, a vegetarian). Lance also creates a fake journal presenting it as Kyle’s. In a very short period of time Kyle , albeit posthumously, becomes a high-school celebrity and is rolling in his casket under a downpour of serious adoration from those who saw him as a nothing while he was still kicking about. Attention infused guilt-trip eventually gets to Lance and he admits to everyone about what really happened to Kyle and about the scandalous source of Kyle’s fake suicide note and fake journals. Clair runs off to fuck some Mike guy. Everyone now hates Lance in a big bad way. Now Lance, Andrew, and Lance’s next-door asthmatic pack-rat of a neighbor are piled on their happy couch , and all three are stuffing their faces with Special Brownies (yes, those) while watching Night of the living Dead.
The End.

I would not know what to do with a doughebag of a kid like that. Kid being a pervert i’s fine. Life is complicated. Sometimes you just need to have a crusty sock and pictures of old women with glasses and tentacles throwing themselves at midgets with power tools spraying pasta sauce… It’s ok! Some folk are just weird like that. What is not ok is being carelessly rude and mean with little to no regard for those around you. It is not ok to be selfish and treat people who depend on you as if they were garbage.

Fuck this weirdness. I am going back to bed. I have a dream waiting for me, with this girl I knew… getting violated by an over-sized version of her own dog that shits on her immediately after, and this girls therapy ends up costing her way more than $200.

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